A long time ago at a day job I used to leave robocalls. The company email server would fail so I had to leave a mass phone message telling everyone in the building their email was down. About 500 people would get the phone message. I could walk across the floor and hear my own voice dozens of time as people listened to their messages on speakerphone. It sounded like a series of echos. A dozen people would ring me back and tell me what a nice voice I had. I’d thank them. One time I was getting over a nasty case of strep throat. It scarred the vocal chords and knocked me down an octave or two. My voice went deep, way deep, with a sandpaper grain to it. The email server went down again and I left a mass message. I could hear it echoing across the floor. I could hear people discussing it in their cubicles. It’s an odd sensation walking across a floor and hearing people talk about your voice from inside their cubicles. None of them had any idea I was passing by. The reviews were all positive. The ladies especially seemed to love it. Some listened to it twice. I got calls from several of them. They’d giggle and tell me how sexy my voice was. I thanked them. Some came by my cubicle and told me in person. I thanked them too. Some I’d never seen before came by and introduced themselves. I said hello and thanked them. One said my voice was incredibly sexy. I blamed the strep throat. She said you ought to get sick more often. I said I’ll try. She batted her eyes, purred a see ya tiger, and slunk away.

(2008)