I once got paid to write slogans for funny buttons. This was decades ago. Those stupid funny buttons you used to see? This company made most of them. A bunch of them had my funny sayings on them. Somewhere there’s a list of maybe a hundred one liners I dashed off and mailed to them, each ten words or less. They picked a bunch of them. The only one I can remember was all those shitty movies and he still gets a stamp? Their focus group (seriously, a funny button focus group) loved that one. I rolled my eyes. Sometime later I was at a club talking to a lady. She was gorgeous. A nerdy little guy walked by wearing that button. It was dayglo green and the line looked even dumber on a button than it did on paper. That’s so stupid, the lady said. I decided not to tell her I had written it. Still, the pay was $25 a button (nearly $50 in today’s money) which means, per word, it was the best paying writing gig I ever had.