Breathe deep and listen

(Brick’s Picks, LAWeekly)

Wednesday at the Troubadour is the extraordinary Malian band Tinariwen, about whom every desert cliché has been written by rock critics already. All we’ll say is we are absolute suckers for these guys, and highly recommend their albums if you like your Malian sounds cut through with earthy blues and a “Memo From Turner” kind of Stones groove, or if you’ve ever felt the eerie pull of gnawa. And while we do not encourage the use of illegal substances of any kind whatsoever, if you should somehow catch a whiff of hash in the air, breathe deep and listen.

Book ‘em, Dano

(Not sure when I wrote this, but quite a while ago, or to whom even.)

So it was Tuesday night last night. I love Tuesday nights. No responsibility nights. Nothing to worry about nights. Deadline is six days off. I’ve already scheduled everything—bills, whatever—over the weekend. Already did the bigtime job search thing Monday morning. So Tuesday night there’s nothing. Almost never go out on Tuesdays (summer excepted). Fyl cooked up a light dinner. Eat a lot of light dinners. I found a bottle of Giant Chicken wine. (Well, it has a big rooster on the label, but I can never remember the name so it’s just Giant Chicken). Polished off half of that. That’s a lot for me. Then cracked open a good bottle of port. I’m old enough now to enjoy port. (You have another seven or eight years to go, but it happens.)  Looking through a drawer in the coffee table here, behind a stack of Playboys (seriously, a stash of Playboys, somehow I get a free subscription) and I found half a joint. I’ll be damned. Some stoner must have dropped it at my birthday party. They take out the zines and clean their pot on the centerfolds. There’s always an expanse of white ass in the center that makes it easy to see the seeds. This was explained to me. Anyway, I fired it up. Yow. Pharmaceutical grade. The hockey game got very confusing but quite beautiful.  Poured another glass of port. The game ended. Fyl switched to Star Trek.  Cool, my favorite ever episode. Frank Gorshin painted black on one side, white on the other chasing some dude who was white on the one side and black on the other.  Their bi-coloration was unusually vivid this time. I was really getting into it. Settled back on the pillow. So sweet, baby. Closed my eyes just for a second. Opened them. Jack Lord said book ’em Dano. Some guy in a flowered shirt and a lei around his neck. What the? Hours had passed. It was like 2 in the morning all of a sudden.

Seizure meds have made me such a wimp. I love to drink, but man, what a lightweight I’ve become. So I rarely do more than a couple glasses of wine. Open a bottle and it sits there a couple days. Or maybe it’s just that I ain’t used to this new pot. It’s all so potent now. Or maybe it’s both. Whatever. Book ‘em, Dano.

Big dude clothes

(email, 2010)

Amazing! Big dude clothes for free!‏

Attention big but not too tall dudes who are cheap:

There is a big closet full of beautiful shirts, jackets, vests and the like that Fyl’s uncle will no longer be needing (ahem).  It’s probably 15 jackets and maybe 50 shirts. We trashed the beat up stuff, and this is all fine and even unworn things. I think there’s a suit or two in there as well. And a gorgeous leather jacket. Plus some way slick vests. And I think an air force uniform even. Basically the dude had class. And liked to eat. Everything is free. That’s right….all the clothes are free. Big guy clothes are never free. There is a whole industry built on little guys gouging big guys with overpriced Pakistani clothes that look stupid and shrink instantly. But this is nice stuff. Classy stuff. And free. All ya gotta do is pick it up. The perfect gift for that sadsack in your life. A nice blazer, ya know, makes the man. Look at me. I was the guy standing outside Home Depot that no one would hire. Then I traded in my wife beaters for a sport coat and look at me now, I’m the freaking Cary Grant of jazz critics. It could happen to you, or your loser brother, or even a dumpy bass player. A whole life changing wardrobe for free. Whatever remains will provide new trombones for the San Bernardino Salvation Army band.

See ya……

Brick

Postscript:

A very hip restauranteur took them…we delivered them for the price of a dinner that very night. Showed up in front of his place there with armloads of the things. Dump ‘em on the floor there, he said, in front of the kitchen. So we did. It was a vast pile of clothes in plain view of all the beautiful people. Not like he cared. He started excitedly pawing through them. You’ve given me my wardrobe for the next two years! He strutted about in one of the blazers, it went well with his spattered chef’s shirt.

His girlfriend nixed the loud Hawaiian shirts. Not on your life she said, threatening arguments and withheld favors. He gave in, and off to Goodwill they went, to thrill some porcine hipster. But then what do chicks know from fashion anyway?

Ants

(2004)

This morning in front of our place on way to work I stepped over a column of argentine ants (the omnipresent little black fuckers). I stopped, briefcase in hand, and reached down and stuck a finger gently in their midst. They swirled about it, confused. Once some had clambored aboard, I stood up and stared at my digit intently, hoping one would bite me, as I read late last night that they actually do have a tiny, if ineffectual, bite. They never bit. Then I happened to notice a neighbor staring at me…. The life of an amateur myrmecologist is a lonely and misunderstood one.

Valentine’s Day

They say
this was where Ray-
mundo Chandler drunk
and wrote and thunk
he oughta write some more.
What for?
Come on
Lay on the floor,
the hardwood floor.
See
out that window there,
LA unfolds in the sun,
a golden poppy that one
could pick and it would wilt
like the wine I so spilt
on my shirt.
Come on,
Flirt
here on the floor.
The nuns across the street
are long gone.
There are movie stars there now
in limousines and
silk suits and great legs.
Tonight we’ll hide in the hedge
and throw eggs.
But now
From this old wood floor–
see the ceiling above?
Love.
That’s what the day is for.

(1990’s)

You could wipe your hands on them

I was at a party at a westside club a couple years ago. One of those afternoon things, cheap beer, hot dogs, loud music, old friends, good times. The place was Liquid Kitty, a sweet little watering hole on Pico. I’ve known the owner since Ye Olde Days, maybe a quarter century or so back. We were both thin and had lots of hair then. Now he is thin and has lots of hair and every once in a while he books a bunch of Ye Olde punk bands from Ye Olde Days and they play all day long in the joint to a crowd half full of Yo Olde Geezers and half under thirty types who think we are soooooo cool. You knew Darby Crash? Was he just like the movie? You opened for Black Flag? Wow!!!!! I always want to point out that was over thirty years ago and shame on them for not coming up with their own musical rebellion like everyone else did before them since the days of ragtime, but I refrain. They’re so cute. And clean. You could wipe your hands on them. And they’d let you.

Ten ten ten ten ten

Good morning everybody….

It’s ten ten ten ten ten.

Cool.

In our ten based civilization, this seems like something special. It ain’t really, and we all know that, but it seems like something special anyway. So dig it.

In a couple years and a couple days and a couple hours and a couple minutes it’ll be 12 12 12 12 12. Babylonians would have dug that.

Next year it’ll be all prime numbers.  Only time in the century.

Holy fuck.

Brick

Nojoqui Falls

(written for and rejected by an online travel site—too long—back in late 90’s.)

Rural California seemed to start with Goleta in the rearview mirror. Driving north out of Santa Barbara on Highway 101, there is a long, gorgeous stretch between mountains and shore, where the elongated Santa Barbara plain is reduced to just a sliver of farmland and undeveloped beach. Eventually it is too narrow even for the fields, and civilization just tapers off into nothingness. Just the road, sea and mountains.

The last vestige of the plain comes to an abrupt end at Gaviota, where the 101 makes a veer to the true north from its western course along the South Coast. A winding pass permits passage through the wall of the Santa Ynez mountains (one of those Transverse ranges, erupting when plates collide and causing so much seismic mischief in the LA Basin). To the burro riding padres of Father Serra’s world this must have seemed a more gradual—if more arduous—transition, but in a speeding car the change is sudden and stunning. The narrow walls of the defile reveal a whole other world of crags and dense oak forests. The mountains are stark, untamed; the slopes impenetrable. Signs warn of falling rocks and wild beasts. We sped up the long grade, at the top of which was a truck pullover, where a battered orange sign announced “Nojoqui Park”. Curiosity got the best of me and I veered off.

Once off the highway, we were plunged immediately into the primeval forest. An ancient, narrow road, cracked and sundered, twisted its way round slopes beneath the trees. The air was dark, almost creepy, penetrated only feebly by rays of sunlight. Birds flushed in all directions. We had the near instantaneous feeling of being lost, only minutes off the 101. Round we wound, down and down, till at last we were dumped into a sparkling green valley. We parked along side a rotting wooden fence to stretch our legs and snap some pictures. Birds called from all directions and a rabbit darted at our feet. We walked about a bit, listening and watching. We were completely on our own in this tiny, beautiful valley. I had no idea where this Nojoqui Park—or even what—would be, but if it were anything as beautiful as this then we were in for a treat. Back in the car, my wife studied the county map and found Nojoqui Falls. Now our curiosity was truly piqued, and we followed the old road, which in a few minutes seemed to lead us right through a farm, past barn and aging machinery. A right turn eventually led us to the park. As if out of nowhere, there were crowds of people about, seemingly hundreds of them, and animals—cows, pigs, sheep and goats by the score. We had stumbled onto a gathering of the Buellton 4H club. Fortunately there was plenty of parking under the pines where the trail began. It was a very gradual uphill walk of perhaps three-quarters of a mile, alongside the gurgling stream, round trees and over rocks, some laid out stepwise. Squirrels chattered in the branches. The weather had turned cool, cloudy and was threatening rain, and in these coastal canyons you could still feel the dampness of the morning’s fog.

Suddenly, the narrow canyon opened up and the sounds of the creek were swallowed in the rush of falling water. Ahead towered Nojoqui Falls. A good 80 feet in height, its grandeur was not in the volume of water tumbling over but the cathedral-like patterns of its fall. The rock upstream, it seems, is an easily soluble limestone while the falls themselves tumble over much harder granite. Over the eons evaporating mists have left their mineral mark and built up layers of limestone in the very shape of the Falls themselves, and then the water, in its turn erodes patterns anew and falls in the most perfectly graceful gestures. A perpetual motion machine of water and rock and air, Nojoqui Falls shall continue its slow, inexorable growth until the limestone that lines the stream above is eroded away completely. There was a bench and we sat and watched the water flow through its ancient etchings. It seemed such a shame that we had left the camera behind in the car. We had the binoculars, though, and through them observed flycatchers and bluebirds flitting in the branches above. I walked down to the pool and reached in elbow deep. The water was cold, clear. The footing slippery. We sat and watched and listened. The mist wafted into our faces. Who knows for how long people have come to this place tucked back in the mountains to watch and listen. Who knows what spiritual significance this place held for the local Chumash Indian civilization. Indeed, that such a splendid and rare natural phenomenon has remained but a county park is one of bureaucracy’s little mysteries—though Santa Barbara County has done an excellent job maintaining the site (and providing the geologic information on these very peculiar falls). The urge to remain just a little bit longer was powerful. But for us time was pressing. Places to go, reservations to keep. We tracked back to the car, slowly. The sound of falling water faded behind us. Squirrels rattled about in the trees and the sun was breaking through.

Back in the parking lot all was a bustle of competition. Walking past the car I wandered down to the 4H pens, where kids in their green ties and caps gently prodded their hogs around before the judges. Those reservations would hold a few minutes longer. I watched, applauding, and took in the sweet reek of pig.

Nojoqui Falls

Nojoqui Falls

Nice white people wriggling

[from a Brick’s Picks in the LA Weekly]

It might just be easier to head over to Vitello’s where we are surprised as hell to see Katia Moraes & Sambaguru playing Friday. In fact, if you love Brazilian music this is a must. The band smokes no matter what style, so tight, so limber. And she is a world class Brazilian vocalist who’ll remind you eerily at times of Elis Regina. She’s has more stage presence, charisma and enthusiasm than maybe anybody in town. We have to wonder how the nice white people in their little chairs at Vitello’s are going to handle just sitting there once she and her band get moving. They’ll be wriggling over their pasta and then realize it and stop. And then start wriggling again. Make reservations now.

Midget usher

(2010)

Went to the Playboy Jazz festival yesterday with Fyl. Had a ball. Great jazz, cool people, free press food, free press booze, perfect weather, and hot pants and high heels. I mean, lots, wow. Like being in high school in the 70’s again.
 
I was talked into going off to smoke a joint with a beautiful Filipina woman. She got me so stoned I could barely walk. But hell, it’s the Playboy Jazz Fest.  Anything goes.
 
And there was that midget security guard. She had this badass glare, like you make one short joke, sucker, and you can forget about being a daddy. I stayed out of her way.
 
All kinds of other stuff, too. 12 hours worth. And it was only the first day. This is a great life.
 
Went back today with a pal and behaved myself all day. Had a couple beers. Great music. Amazing seats. Gorgeous women. Midget usher.
 
I just wanted to say midget usher. But there really was one.