Girl Scout cookies

Signed up for Medicare last night, then for Kaiser’s Senior Advantage Plan. All these pictures of sweet old people. Then today the Girl Scout cookies arrive, six different kinds. I opened the shortbread cookies. Not the Tagalongs, not the Do-Si-Dos, not the Lemon Whatevers or the Samoas. Not even the Thin Mints. I’d never not immediately opened the Thin Mints in my entire life. It was like it was a law, or biology, something involuntary that compels us to open up the thin mints first. Maybe it’s pheremonal. But no, this time I opened the shortbread cookies. I can’t even remember what they’re called. But only old people open the shortbread cookies first. Grandmas especially. They put them on a plate next to the ginger snaps and vanilla wafers. Grandma cookies.

My wife went right for the thin mints.